Mermaids Ahoy
by Susan M. M
Summary: When Miguel's Whiskers detect something unusual, Krieg sees an oppotyuity for shore leave, Rated for language, to be continued.
1. Chapter 1nMermaid Cove:

**Mermaids Ahoy!**

A _seaQuest_ story by Susan M. M.

Sensor Chief Miguel Ortiz swore quietly but vulgarly in Spanish,

Lt. Timothy O'Neill looked over at him disapprovingly. Miguel seldom swore on duty, and never swore so strongly. Tim doubted anyone knew enough Spanish to realize how foul Miguel's choice of vocabulary was. Most of his shipmates could say ' _cerveza fria, por favor'_ and _donde esta el bano_?" but not much more.

"Problem, Mr, Ortiz?" Captain Nathan Bridger asked.

"The Whiskers are picking up something odd," the best Sonar tech in the UEO confessed.

"Odd, what, how?" the captain asked. Bridger was a muscular middle-aged man, still handsome enough to turn the heads of women young enough to be his daughters.

"I'm hearing something large and metallic hitting something else large and metallic, but when I raise periscopes to take a look, this is what I see." Miguel transferred the image from the Whiskers' cameras to the _seaQuest_ 's main viewscreen.

"Mermaids ahoy!" Lt. Ben Krieg, the boat's Morale and Supply Officer wolf-whistled in a way unsuited to an officer and a gentleman.

The viewscreen showed four women in obviously fake mermaid costumes. – with neon pink, turquoise green, and royal blue tails. "Must be Mermaid Cove."

"No shit, Sherlock," Senior Chief Petty Officer Manilow Crocker muttered in Krirg's ear.

"No, I mean Mermaid Cove RenFaire," Krieg replied. "We had a chance to get discount tickets through MWR, but I didn't think our deployment schedule would permit us to attend."

"RenFaire? Asked Ucas Wolrnczak, the submarine's teenaged computer analyst and unofficial mascot. "Is that where people play dress up and go on field trips to the 16th century?"

Krieg nodded. "Don't knock it if you haven't tried it. You've never been to a RenFaire, have you, kid?"

The 16-year-old computer specialist shook his head. The length of his blond hair showed he was a civilian passenger, not a UEO sailor...

"We've got to take you, Lucas, It's an educational experience."

"Knowing Krieg, he's referring to the damsels with the bodices that display their bosoms as if on a silver platter. Not as a chance to learn about Elizabethan England," Lt. Cmdr. Katie Hitchcock said cynically. She spoke not as the Chief Engineer of the boat, but as Ben Krieg's ex-wife.

"I fear you're correct, Ms. Hitchcock," Captain Bridger agreed. "I take it you think we should broaden Mr. Wolenczak's horizons.."

"Definitely, sir," Krieg replied.

"You been to one of these, Katie,?" Lucas Wolenczak asked.

She nodded. "Great Lakes Naval Training Center is fairly close to Bristol RenFaire. It's one of the older, more established faires."

"My impression from the information MWR sent me, is that Mermaid Cove IS A smaller, younger faire, Should still be fun. And educational for the kid," Krieg said,

Bridger nodded. He'd been to RenFaires himself and thought Lucas would find one both fun and educational.

" _Mira_ , they've spotted us." Ortiz pointed to the viewscreen. The pink-tailed mermaid had put a plastic telescope to her eye,

"She's not seeing much through that." Chief Crocker predicted. "That's a kaleidoscope, not a spyglass. I just bought my nephew one identical to that for his birthday. Besides, she's not a real mermaid."

"Mermaids are make-believe," Lucas Wolenczak said,

"Don't tell Jonathan that," Krieg teased.

"Didn't they keelhaul insubordinate lieutenants during the Renaissance?" Ford asked no one in particular.

"I believe you're correct," Bridger told his XO. "A custom that was unfortunately fallen out of fashion."


	2. Finding Ben a Babysitter

"Mr. Krieg, I need you to take a launch ashore and investigate," Bridger ordered.

"Yes, sir. Should I take Mr. Wolenczak with me?

"Not until we've determined what the situation is," the captain replied.

Lucas looked disappointed. Like any teenaged boy, the thought of damsels in push-up bodices intrigued his budding hormones.

"Sir, is it safe to send Lt. Krieg ashore unsupervised?" Lt. asked.

"Are you volunteering for the job, Katie?" the captain asked.

She shook her head. "No longer my responsibility, thank God."

"Good grief, is that the _Barnacle_?" Chief Crocker asked.

Bridger and the rest of the bridge crew looked up at the viewscreen. Instead of mermaids it now showed a wooden ship – a 2/3 scale model of a 16th century galleon.

"Can't be." Crocker shook his head. "The _Barnacle_ should be in Hollywood."

Darwin, the dolphin member of seaQuest's crew, stuck his head out of the moon pool. Water-fillled tubes ran throughout the submarine, permitting him access to every part of the boat. "Not Barnacle, bagpipes."

"He's right," Crocker agreed. "I hear pipes."

Walking along the deck of the Barnacle, they saw a pretty blonde playing the bagpipes, and a brunette playing a round drum. Both were dressed as if they had just stepped off the set of _Outlander_.

"What's that round drum?" Lucas Wolenczak asked.

"That's a bodhrán," Crocker told him, "popular for Celtic folk music."

"I don't suppose you know what song they're playing?" Lucas asked, knowing the chief was an expert on ocean folklore, including sea shanties.

"Henry Morgan," Crocker replied. "the song tells how he turned pirate upon the salt sea to support his family.

Bridger contacted his Chief Medical Officer's PAL. "Kristin, hast thou ever been to a Renaissance Faire. Not quite historically accurate, Henry Morgan was a privateer, not a pirate."

"What? One of those festivals where they misquote Shakespeare and sell roast turkey legs for more than the grocery store charges for the whole bird?:"

"Aye, aye, ma'am., that's the one."Bridger said. "We've apparently discovered one ashore, Ben Krieg seems to think it's our scientific obligation to investigate mermaids."

"As a marine biologist, I confess to being curious about the mermaids, but I suspect what you really want is a babysitter for Ben," Kristin Westphalen, M.D., Ph. D. guessed.

Ignoring the captain's privacy, Krieg stepped up and interjected himself into the conversation, "Rather than babysitter, I'd phrase it: my lady, may I have the pleasure of escorting you to the RenFaire?"

She shook her head. "No longer my responsibility, thank God."

 _Cerveza_ fria _,_ por _favor_ = cold beer, please

 _Donde_ esta _el_ Bano = where is the bathroom?

MWR = Morale, Welfare, and Recreation

WSKRs (Wireless Sea Knowledge Retrieval Satellites)

 _Mira = Look!_

Whiskers = WSKRs (Wireless Sea Knowledge Retrieval Satellites)

PAL: anyone remember what PAL stands for - it was the personal communication devise used by the crew


	3. Chapter 2

"Mr. Krieg, I need you to take a launch ashore and investigate," Bridger ordered.

"Yes, sir. Should I take Mr. Wolenczak with me?

"Not until we've determined what the situation is," the captain replied.

Lucas looked disappointed. Like any teenaged boy, the thought of damsels in push-up bodices intrigued his budding hormones.

"Sir, is it safe to send Lt. Krieg ashore unsupervised?" Lt. asked.

"Are you volunteering for the job, Katie?" the captain asked.

She shook her head. "No longer my responsibility, thank God."

"Good grief, is that the _Barnacle_?" Chief Crocker asked.

Bridger and the rest of the bridge crew looked up at the viewscreen. Instead of mermaids it now showed a wooden ship – a 2/3 scale model of a 16th century galleon.

"Can't be." Crocker shook his head. "The _Barnacle_ should be in Hollywood."

Darwin, the dolphin member of seaQuest's crew, stuck his head out of the moon pool. Water-fillled tubes ran throughout the submarine, permitting him access to every part of the boat. "Not Barnacle, bagpipes."

"He's right," Crocker agreed. "I hear pipes."

Walking along the deck of the Barnacle, they saw a pretty blonde playing the bagpipes, and a brunette playing a round drum. Both were dressed as if they had just stepped off the set of _Outlander_.

"What's that round drum?" Lucas Wolenczak asked.

"That's a bodhrán," Crocker told him, "popular for Celtic folk music."

"I don't suppose you know what song they're playing?" Lucas asked, knowing the chief was an expert on ocean folklore, including sea shanties.

"Henry Morgan," Crocker replied. "the song tells how he turned pirate upon the salt sea to support his family."

Bridger contacted his Chief Medical Officer's PAL. "Kristin, hast thou ever been to a Renaissance Faire. Not quite historically accurate, Henry Morgan was a privateer, not a pirate."

"What? One of those festivals where they misquote Shakespeare and sell roast turkey legs for more than the grocery store charges for the whole bird?:"

"Aye, aye, ma'am., that's the one."Bridger said. "We've apparently discovered one ashore, Ben Krieg seems to think it's our scientific obligation to mermaids."

"As a marine biologist, I confess to being curious about the mermaids, but I suspect what you really want is a babysitter for Ben," Dr. Kristin Westphalen guessed.

Ignoring the captain's privacy, Krieg stepped up and interjected himself into the conversation, "Rather than babysitter, I'd phrase it: my lady, may I have the pleasure of escorting you to the RenFaire?"

She shook her head. "No longer my responsibility, thank God."

 _Cerveza_ fria _,_ por _favor_ = cold beer, please

 _Donde_ esta _el_ bano = where is the bathroom?

WSKRs (Wireless Sea Knowledge Retrieval Satellites)

 _Mira = Look!_

Whiskers = WSKRs (Wireless Sea Knowledge Retrieval Satellites)

PAL:


End file.
